I've always been unsettled yet so excited by the future. The possibility of the unknown YET knowing that God has it all in His hands is amazing.
Since I was 12, I have known photography was cool. I thought that I wanted to make it my profession. But that was so far away in my middleschool mind. I had time to think about it.
Then highschool came and went and I'm here. Approaching the end of the first quarter of my senior year. God has taught me so much. Looking back I see that NOW is the future I saw when I was in 7th grade. NOW is the time I thought I would never reach. And it's here. Boom. Like that.
After so much praying and so much thinking I know what I am doing next year. God's specific plan for me is still a mystery but I know what He wants me to do.
He wants me to be a full time wedding + couple photographer.
Yes, fresh out of highschool. Yes, with no solo weddings of my own. Yes, it's daunting and yes it's frightening. It's so tempting to say, "How can I ever get there? How can I ever graduate and then start building a business? Especially in such a popular industry?" Anxiety, fear, doubt, unbelief. How. Can I. No. Maybe.
"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my rightous right hand." [isaiah 41:10]
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare, and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart." [jeremiah 29:11-13]
I serve the God who said those words. I believe that He told me part of His plan for me. I know and so I trust. It's not easy. Honestly, when I tell people what I want to do after I graduate, I agree with the raised eyebrows and polite nods. But God is bigger than my fears. He is greater than my doubts. His plan is perfect.
I need to work by His grace to accomplish His plan. It's not going to drop out of the sky and on to my lap. He calls me to work. He tells me to trust and then take action, relying on His strength and grace all the way. That verse says that if I seek Him with my whole heart I will FIND Him. He WILL hear my cries for grace + clarity. He will satisfy me with Himself.
That my friends is the most comforting news. And that is why I am following His direction in my life.
And on top of that, I just really like weddings + couples. They are pretty much my favoritest ever. But more on that in the next post. :)
[stay tuned for part II.]